There was a torrential storm with gale-force winds on Wednesday that essentially shut down many folks’ plans including the MSFA parade scheduled for that day, and at least one guy – who I met on the elevator the day before – who had golf plans with his buddies that got washed out. And when I say washed out, I mean – the wind was blowing HARD and the rain was coming in sideways.

At some point I heard shouting and looked out to see about ten or so people doing pushups on the beach in front of three others standing over them and thought, what the fuck?? When I say that it was a storm, I mean the winds were gusting so strong I didn’t want to be on the balcony (the rain blowing on me notwithstanding) and later I would see the beach patrol cruising up and down all day chasing the stupid folks away from the ocean’s edge. I’ve never been to the beach during a storm like this and it was mildly unsettling – I cannot imagine what a hurricane would feel like here, on this barrier island surrounded by water. (Yes I know that sounded redundant, and I. Don’t. Care.)

I sat in the room most of the day and watched the ocean get choppier and choppier as plastic balcony furniture got tossed against the metal railings all day long, reminiscent of the clanging noises featured in the Titanic movie. Afraid it would all blow away, I went out there at one point to strategically place the chairs on their backs with the tops wedged under the railing facing the bay, and the little table between the legs. At one point the table flipped so that its legs went through the railing on top of the chairs and I left it there.

Speaking of the Titanic, the whole world was riveted by the lost Titan submersible and I was no exception. Being indoors left me with plenty of time to check for updates and reading the latest novel from Lisa See, Lady Tan’s Circle of Women, which was outstanding by the way if – like me – you love historical Chinese novels. This one is, according to Goodreads, “a triumphant reimagining of the life of a woman who was remarkable in the Ming dynasty,” and whose teachings are still used today.

Circling back to the storm, I was so disturbed by the water in the toilet moving like we were on a ship at sea that I videoed it to prove I wasn’t crazy and Todd was all nonchalant about it like it happens every day. Something about the ventilation pipes but I’m not letting it go. It was supernatural.

In other observances, I noticed the return of a fashion trend from the 80s/early 90s that I’ll admit I also did back when I was size 2 and 110lbs – the unzipped shorts on the boardwalk. Bikini, with shorts on and unzipped to show I-don’t-know-what but it was a thing and it’s back. It was a LOL moment, at least for me.

Less of a LOL moment was the constant smell of marijuana everywhere and I’m no Karen but it was annoying as hell and really did tarnish the outdoor experience at times. There’s no smoking ON the boardwalk but you can sit on your balcony overlooking the boardwalk and smoke until your brain melts and aint nobody can stop that. Pot was a regular player in my formative years (thanks Mom & George) so I’ve been relatively unphased by it except it’s far skunkier than it was in the 80s; however, Todd’s conservative upbringing and his own personal constitution leaves him feeling stabby.

There’s a 420 store next the Candy Kitchen we can see from our balcony – a very well-thought-out placement, regardless of who got there first. We went to the Candy Kitchen on the second day for our usual fudge fix – buy 2lbs get one free – and the conversation with the employee went like this:

Us: We’d like buy some fudge.

Todd: Let’s get the chocolate peanutbutter truffle.

Employee: That’s not included in the buy-2-get-1.

Todd: Okay… so we’ll get a quarter-pound of that and then we’ll get vanilla and peanutbutter.

Employee: The chocolate peanutbutter truffle isn’t included.

Todd: *looks at me what-the-fuckedly*

Me: Fine, forget the chocolate peanutbutter truffle –

Todd: But –

Me: For NOW. So we’ll have two pounds of vanilla, and one pound of the regular peanutbutter.

Employee: Which pound do you want for free?

My heart weeps for the future. Either the 420 next door is included with employment or this child needs to wake up. Anyhoo, we got our 3 pounds of fudge AND a quarter p0und of the chocolate peanutbutter truffle, which was delicious and didn’t last the week.

We had reservations for The Hobbit for dinner but I waited too long to make them and so the only times were at 5 or 8:45. Neither one of us was highly motivated at 4:00 to get ready for dinner and go out in that storm so we canceled and kinda chilled for few hours before we decided to go to Bull on the Beach. We passed two women on our way into the parking garage who looked ridiculous still holding onto their inverted umbrellas. Amateurs.

We made our usual stop at Fisher’s for caramel popcorn on the way out. I got in line behind a woman who couldn’t decide which size to buy, then what flavor, and then “can we combine flavors in the same bucket?” which seemed to be the end of it until she asked how much for the special tins? Each question and answer was also broadcast to her daughter for approval. This went on for far longer than any normal person has patience and clearly this woman had her hands full in her disheveled appearance, hair askew, one ankle strap twisted, and autistic adult daughter who had nothing to do with the indecision and more aware of the growing line behind her than her mother.

By the time she paid and was kindly asked to move to the pickup window, there were at least eight people behind me. She never so much as glanced in our direction. Then, at the pickup window, she stood in front of it waiting for her special order, completely oblivious to those of us whose orders were ready by stating, I didn’t order that. No, but I did and excuse me I’d like to pick it up thank you very much. Smile, smile.