We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Program …

Omg, omg, O.M.G. This bitch has just burst, like a hot blister on the heel inside a new shoe. Days that start out aggravating for me generally progress from the minor annoyance of an unfortunate mosquito bite to full-blown, venom-infused tirades.

The cat has been meowing for food all day, which I’ve given him, and which he then lets the dogs eat instead.

Sabra was startled by Ava and stepped IN the water bowl, splattering water everywhere and leaving a terrified trail to the sliding glass doors.

I found a half-emptied dishwasher by a well-meaning house-dweller, and the suspect’s dirty dishes left on the counter. This same suspect would re-enter the kitchen several hours later to make a PB&J sandwich, the remnants of which could be found smeared on the counter, on the handle of the trash can, and globules on the floor.

There were 5 – count that, FIVE – pairs of Ava’s shoes in my kitchen (thankfully none smudged with grape jelly) after having repeatedly been told not to leave them there.

Empty food wrappers on the coffee table. Regular occurrence. But today – akin to plucking all the petals off my last rose.

The dog decided to lie on the freshly vacuumed bedroom carpet, and left bloody spots where her body had been. (Don’t ask.) Because I just love scrubbing stains out of rugs on my hands and knees.

I can’t wear my wedding rings. I’m supremely pissed off by this. I seem to have inherited my beloved Nana’s arthritis of the hands, and fingers are swollen and I had to get the rings off before they had to be cut off.

The Laundry Debacle.  I had left a load of Todd’s wash in the washing machine, and half a load of other clothes in the dryer (the remaining half was folded in a basket on the folding table). I went back to finish what I started and found Todd’s clothes in the dryer, the dryer clothes were thrown into a heap in a basket on the floor, and there were – get this – wet clotheson top of the folded stuff on the table. The washing machine was empty.  Having no idea WTF was going on, I went looking for an answer. Turns out Nephew was going to wash some clothes. But he really had no idea what had happened.

Later, I found ONE shirt in the washer running on heavy soil, very hot water, maximum extract and the time remaining was 2 hours. And, streaks of laundry detergent running down the front of the washer – which I had only wiped down two days before because it looked a lot worse.

Meanwhile, upstairs, the dogs had begun eating their own food and dropping nuggets all over the kitchen floor, which I had just swept.

Then I got a call from Owen that he’s ready to be picked up from practice – for the first time all season RIGHT ON TIME. Every other day it’s been 10, 15, 20, 25 minutes late, forcing me to change the routine and drop Ava off at her practice at 6 first so she’s not late. That’s when I saw the text from Ava’s coach that practice will be at 5:45 now and the rest of the week – at 5:40. So now she’s late. Once she was dropped off, I headed toward the high school, only to be rerouted due to an overturned tractor trailer carrying logs. And then Owen calls me again to find out where I am, as I’m pulling to the lot.

I don’t know how these people run their organizations! I’m so frustrated at the lack of consideration for parent’s schedules, changing practice times on short notice and holding kids in practice while parents wait outside for 25 minutes, as IF we have nothing better to do with our time, AND I was scheduled for concession stand duty this Saturday from 3 to 5, when I’m supposed to be at work and it’s somehow my responsibility to switch with another parent, but since there’s no contact list I have no way to do that, and won’t get my $35 deposit back…. And this guy pulls out in front of me, effectively cutting me off and eliciting the foul-mouthed splendor that is me today. 

Oh gee – what else could go wrong? 

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