It’s been a difficult couple of days. Without too many details, I haven’t been feeling well and it’s not contagious and I need to call a doctor this morning. And, like the icing on the proverbial cake, my anxiety is off the charts. Watching real-time television is not recommended during these times.
Last weekend we had snow, nothing debilitating but roads were covered and slippery and I wasn’t feeling well and, as I said before, my anxiety had reached the moon. Veruca was supposed to go to her dad’s and so he came down and picked her up, which was very nice and I’m grateful.
So I pulled myself together and drove up to get her last night, driving the usual route through countryside shared with Amish folks. I learned several years ago on a field trip to The Amish Farm that Sundays alternate between church days and visiting days. Church days are great because there are few buggys on the road in the evening. Visiting days, however, are quite the opposite. I always forget which weekend it is.
I came up upon three cars driving 30 mph in a 45, behind a buggy making a left turn. Usually drivers speed up after passing the buggy, but last night the front car continued to drive like there was a foot of snow on the road. I soon found myself driving 20 mph with no buggy in sight and cursing a blue streak at people who shouldn’t be on the roads if they’re afraid of a few snow drifts.
I jumped around radio stations, mistakenly tuning into CNN where the topic was over the cabinet picks’ upcoming hearings and how none of them have turned in their paperwork yet, and some GOP dude was accusing the Dems of throwing shade once again at the Republican party and being sore losers. Bullshit! I changed the channel to Broadway and sang along to Hopelessly Devoted at the top of my lungs, and felt a little better.
By the time I arrived at my ex’s house I was listening to Joel Osteen, who preached about not letting anything steal your joy – for example, when a driver pulls out in front of you and you want to just yell at them and wave your fist? Let it go. Don’t let that steal your joy. Well, wasn’t that apropos?
Veruca gets into the car and we’re not more than half a block away when she tells me this really terrible story that she read in the news. I asked her how she heard about this story and where, because it gave me goosebumps. A woman came home from work one night where she was a bartender, got into an argument with her husband who pushed her down the stairs, and she died. V thought it was so sad and terrible. The man is in jail and the two small children are now with their grandparents. She reiterated her thoughts about it and asked me, isn’t that just so sad. I was stunned.
Stunned, because it bears a remarkable resemblance to another story I’ve heard, except the woman’s fall was broken by a gate at the top of the stairs and so she never fell down and died. But had the gate not been there… I might be telling a very different story.
So Joel Osteen was still on, and the sermon he was now giving was titled, I’m Still Standing. That we all go through difficulties, but God is in charge and we will not be defeated. That divorce or bad break should’ve broken you, or that addiction, or partying lifestyle should’ve killed you – but look: You’re still standing.
And suddenly it had all come together for me in a supernatural way. “You may have been knocked down, but you’re not going to stay down…
JOEL: You may be in a difficult time right now, you need to look back and remember what God has done for you. Remember how He’s made a way when you didn’t see a way. Remember how He opened doors that should have never opened. Remember how He put you at the right place at the right time, promoted you, healed you, restored you. If He did it for you once, He can do it for you again….. when the storm is over, when the trouble has passed, when the opposition has ceased, one thing you can count on – You’ll still be standing.
Know that God brought you through the past, and will get you through the future.
A lovely reminder from above, an affirmation.