If you’re pressed for time, here’s the abbreviated version: A drive through Pennsylvania, X’s new house, the restaurant, work, and the stores – grocery, liquor, pet. You can skip ahead to the highlighted stuff, if you want.

I drove Opac to his dad’s, where he’ll be staying for the next several weeks. It’s a fairly new neighborhood in the hills behind an older one, where there are still many empty lots available literally a hop away from the house. Important to note because –

V took me on walk around the neighborhood, opting – to my relief – to go down the biggest hill, which looks like a drop-off to the end of the world, instead of having to go up on the return. Still, my shins were sore for 3 days. She was animated and huggy, my sweet girl, sharing plans for coming home and thoughts about her upcoming birthday.

I didn’t cry when I left her. I didn’t cry when I left O. I felt oddly at peace and was owing it to that massive cry I’d had the night before and likely nothing left in the vault. I drove to Mom’s restaurant, to pick up food I’d ordered for Todd and me.

Beautiful day for a drive… should’ve taken the Mustang. At the restaurant, I slipped on my mask and got out of the car to wait for them to bring the food out. As soon as she stepped outside the gate I started crying. Yep. So much for composure.

I was crying so much I didn’t even realize Andy was not Amanda (sorry Amanda). Oh and – I guess – sorry Andy. There’s nothing like a hug from your mom and I realized in that moment how many people I know who want nothing more than that and cannot have it. And I cried more. I’m deeply sorry to all of you who are hurting this way.

Passed a small forested park on the way home that was literally bursting at the seams. Lot was full and the overflow parked on both sides of the country road, people everywhere and not one wearing a mask. (And this, folks, is why PA continues to report new cases.)

The grocery store had the usual suspects, one whom I actually opened my non-confrontational trap to point out the ONE-WAY aisle they were trespassing in. The cashier at the liquor store had her mask under her chin and my blood pressure topped the charts. She pulled it up before I had a chance to say anything. And then I got my turn as the asshole when I went to the pet store and walked right past the sign that said “curbside pickup.” So, I humbly apologize to the employees there.

Last week was my full-time, in-office week. I came home exhausted every night. Our call volume has increased and we have yet to experience any real lulls in the day. I spent 45 minutes on the phone helping two people get set up for video visits. FORTY-FIVE MINUTES. I am NOT the help desk, but essentially that’s what we’ve become.

I will admit to resenting my new duty as “tech support.” Tech support is Todd’s department and I hate hate hate having to figure out technical stuff.

V is home. It’s the first time she’s been home since March 13^th, and only the 4^th time I’ve seen her. But this week, she sleeps in her bed in the room next to mine, and I hear her moving softly through the house and running on the treadmill and all is right with the world today.

 

Today’s Stats:

Mental Health: Stable and content. However, it’s fair to note that I am still harboring the shock and despair, and ignoring it (and hoping this isn’t a bad thing). Also, a brief bout of extreme anxiety for several hours yesterday after our morning huddle (call-in) thanks to the “please listen to today’s Town Hall because there are employment changes coming that affect us all” (not exact words) in an ominous and somber tone. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

Physical Health: 7 on this rainy day. Joint pain and I’ve been falling into naps around 3:00 for the last two days.

Paper Supplies: 4 bathrooms, 4 rolls in rotation, 6 rolls in stock. (All the makings of a terrible math problem.)

Alcohol: Abysmal. But that’s okay. We’re on the wagon in a vain attempt to get healthier and drop some pounds. (Except for last night’s margaritas, because Cinco de Mayo.)

Books read: On Writing by Stephen King (still reading) and borrowed a book from our breakroom library to read while I’m working from home (the self-imposed deadline is a motivator) – The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt (which, btw, is a can’t-put-down tome of over 700 pages). Pachinko was relegated to the pile of to-be-finished. One of our providers said it’s really good once you get into it, which I don’t doubt.

Today’s T-shirt: White restaurant t-shirt (that he, himself, designed)

Total cancellations: 8 (groomer, dentist, hair, doctor, endocrinologist, and our family Greek Easter dinner)

The shit people are selling on Marketplace:

F250 driver door for $200 – no glass or window motors (is this… a bargain??)

1996 Hallmark gymnastics figurine $10 (this needs a one-way ticket to Goodwill, where it will languish on the dusty shelves of trinkets that time and everyone else wants to forget)

Two Michelin tires “with decent tread but have some dry cracking” $150 (no further comment needed)

A used futon for $80 (I repeat – used)

A beautician sink with faucet for $130 (I have to admit, this might actually be a good idea since we’re all our own hair stylists now)

Movie soundtrack CDs (Hey Betty – nobody else wants them either)

Budweiser Ashtrays $20 (TWENTY DOLLARS for ashtrays? Besides, didn’t they get the memo – everybody in this town just throws their cigarettes out the window?)

Women’s clothes – 25-item lot for $45 – includes Victoria’s Secret Velour bathrobe (because who doesn’t want a used bathrobe?)